Convenient Excuse Isn’t It
A New Trail Of Tears Installment
My life is not conspiracy theory
It is who I am
What I have lived
What I have experienced
Who I have experienced it with
Most of it is redacted
Classified
Scrubbed into the shadows
Labeled as “fake”
Or coopted, grifted, appropriated
But never confronted
I am a human being
I have lived these experiences
To view me as something other
Is to perpetuate the racist, phobic, misogynist system of oppression
That so many claim is myth
The fact that anyone believes my actual life
Is fake
Is proof positive
That privilege is real
You can’t even fathom one aspect
Of one experience
That I have always lived with
Let alone how to address it
You cannot even tolerate hearing about it
Reading about it
Seeing it
Or even knowing it exists
Any aspect of what I have been forced to deal with
Is so offensive to you
That you choose to pretend it’s all in my head
Rather than confront the truth of it
The consequence being
The proliferation of more abuse
More targets
More corruption
More trauma, suffering, damage
More people benefiting from predation
So why bother to do anything else
No one is ever held accountable for any of it
Unless you are among the privileged
Then if you “feel” you have been offended
Lives are cancelled
But we “deserve” it
Because you “feel” you shouldn’t have to “tolerate”
Anyone else living
In their own skin
In their own way
Minding their own business
Attempting to overcome the devastation
Constantly thrown our way
Attempting to grow in consciousness
Being authentic
Growing and progressing
This you find is “threatening”
To what exactly?
Systemic oppression?
You can’t face one small matter
That I have had to deal with my entire existence
I have had to grow up learning how to navigate others hate
Deviance
Predation
I had to learn to survive it myself
But I’m the one who is unstable
For drawing attention to the problems?
What about those committing the crimes against nature
Why do they get a pass
Why aren’t they subjected to mental health commitments?
Obviously they need it!
What about those who support their predation
Why don’t they even get a glance
What about those who apologize for predatory behaviors
Why are manipulators more valuable than the truth itself
What about those who manipulate the truth of social engineering
Why are predators always assumed to be
Then treated as “good” men and women
What about all the lives lost after so many years
Why is the blood of a predator worth so much more than
The blood of the innocent target
Why are we born guilty of whatever you choose to label us as
While you are born pure and given every privilege just based on myth
Why are we forced to endure the hardship you force on us
While you wallow in riches
Hoarding all that is needed to survive this apocalypse you have created
How could I possibly be beneath you
When I have survived all of it
Yet still have not chosen to be like those who choose abuse and violence
Against me, my children, my family, my community, even our history
Our entire existence
To lose all that we are by the millions
Because extreme deviance cannot accept our right to live
Is just inhuman
Yet we are the ones called any and everything
Other than human
Also treated in such ways
I have survived what most can’t even comprehend
But you think you are fit to judge who I am
How would YOU handle just one of the crimes committed against me
Let alone my entire family
Let alone every generation
Let alone my entire community
Let alone an entire lifetime of torture, trauma, rape
Forced impoverishment
Day after day
Forced enslavement
Let alone ALL that I have survived
All that WE all have survived
But systemic oppression is still called “fake”?
This at the hands of those who claim my life is “conspiracy theory”
How would YOU handle it?
Slowly dying at the hands of the sickest
While EVERYONE looks away and passes blame
You can’t put yourself in my position
Not even in your own head
Yet you think you can judge me
Dominate me
Control me
Abuse me
Slander me
Stalk me
Steal from me
Attack me
Because you believe
That I am lying about what I have lived
Or the color of my skin
Or my gender
Or my political affiliations
Or the conditions I have been placed in
Or the consequences of others actions
Regardless of the excuse you have
I am not your assumptions, preconceptions, or projections
I am not your slave!
I am a human being
Born with inalienable rights
Born with freedom
The fact that you spend so much time, money, effort
Trying to take my rights away
Rather than upholding them
Sets the stage at conception
Turning life into “Hunger Games”
The fact that you are incapable of recognizing this
Speaks volumes as to the state of your own existence
The fact that you are capable of believing
That it’s okay to target, abuse, judge, manipulate, condemn
Because of some misguided belief system you have developed
Existing nowhere but in your own head
And within the realm of others who also prey
Doesn’t make you superior or righteous in any way
It’s just unrelenting sickness and fear
That truth will see the light of day
And you will be forced to face a consequence for your sins
But I’m the one who is the “threat”?
That’s profound mental instability
To behave in such ways
But instead
You will scapegoat the results of your arrested development
Onto any and everyone else
Who makes any attempt to be authentic
To live
Outside the bounds of your enslavement chains
I’m not “unstable” for wanting equality
It’s insanity that you could even think such things
“If I can do it no one can”
“If I can’t have it no one will”
“If it’s not me it won’t be anyone then”
Those are the thoughts of predators
Who seek to destabilize people, families, communities, nations
It’s not just childish it’s toxic and endemic
It’s not just abusive
It’s life threatening and suffocating
No different than knees on necks
Suffocating until our last breath
I wonder
How many of us are even left?
I wonder who in the U.S.
Can even answer this?
The White House United Nations UNICEF UNESCO UN Human Rights UN Women Amnesty International Human Rights Watch President Joe Biden Vice President Kamala Harris Speaker Pelosi Steny Hoyer Chuck Schumer Congressional Black Caucus Progressive Caucus Library of Congress World Health Organization CDC Flu U.S. Department of State
