Why Should I Make Abuse Easier For You?

Danielle Diew

5 min readJan 30, 2022

Whole Picture Poetry- A New Trail Of Tears Installment

“No one will help you”

So true!

So do you really think I should have made it easy on you?

SMH

Turns out you didn’t know me so well at all

I always said that

But your arrogance wouldn’t allow you to see truth

Ever

It was such an annoying neurosis

Dealing with you was always like dying inside

Then having to be reborn every time I was alone

Your brand of toxicity is like a zombie virus

It infects quickly

Is persistent

Completely unrelenting

You seek, kill, destroy everything

It gets old fast

Regardless of how fragile your ego can be

No matter

It’s in the past

Now I have all your wounds to contend with

No matter

I grew up getting them all night and day

Every day

In every way

It’s simply a new experience now

Dealing with it while debilitated

Not the 1st time though

One of many

It is my first time being so vulnerable

But not being under attack with nothing protecting me

LOL

He raised me that way, daily

Thank God he’s gone now

Thank God you’re gone!

For me this is a blessing

I finally for the 1st time get to see life through my own lens

Yes of course

He tainted it all my life, particularly beginning at age 3

But I knew this day would come

So I prepared to unleash me

I tucked myself away

Where he couldn’t find me

I had to hide myself away

Because he didn’t allow boundaries

“I will engulf you

Totally and completely”

But it was my primal fear

Being smothered by a sadistic psychopath

So he made sure he amplified that torture in every way

I knew him far better than he ever knew me

Once I got a little distance

I figured out how to breathe while drowning

I’m alive because I learned how to swim in the deep

Regardless of his tactics

I curved them

Got trapped in them

Rose above them

Healed from them

But I never gave in to them

I’m still me

Is anyone out there who survived him living the same?

I wonder!

He didn’t hang around with good people

He abhorred goodness

Anyone around him was full of sickness

His family, friends, cronies, associates

All sick like him

No one should wonder if they are good

Know they are far from it

If he came across something good

He always tried to ruin it

“I ruin everything I touch”

He told me in 1980

I was 5 years old

I would have rather been in class with the other students

Learning coding

Instead I was forced

In mandated school

To learn how to survive him

Then as I did

People labeled me “sick”

“How can anyone survive that!”

No matter what I was always to blame

So why should I care what anyone thinks?

No one cared when I was a kid

No one cares now

Did you honestly believe I thought someone would actually do what’s right

Not if “right” means correct

I expected the “right” to be the “right” no shock there!

I knew it would be this way

So I prepared

He knew I was doing that

So he took everything I ever hoped would help me make it

He gained pleasure from torturing me

He had been that way my entire life

You think that’s surprising to me?

I survived him in spite of all the failure surrounding me

It turns out everything he ever said about everyone

Was quite true and accurate

I was the only person he found confounding

Why

Because I am actually honest, and genuinely have integrity

He wasn’t used to people like me!

LOL

He certainly wasn’t used to genuinely empathy

It’s great that he’s gone

He was so toxic and draining

But his system and cronies he left behind

And they won’t let go of anything!

The system remains in place

That means continued “enhanced torture” and suffering

Still enslaved and it’s January

3oth day

2022AD

I have yet to receive a single ounce of COVID relief

Or my education credentials unredacted

Or payment of my contract

Or the medical help I need

Or aid, or relief

Or anything I and my family need!

Hell

I can’t even access the internet

Not freely!

Not without surveilling

Not without hacking

Not without cyberstalking

Not without bullying

Not without shadow banning

Not without blacklisting!

But race doesn’t matter?

How insulting!

Insurgents are STILL wondering around freely!

SMH UN Human Rights Amnesty International

I’ve lived life this way since my beginning

The consequences of his manipulating

It’s funny that people think

I do these things to myself

People actually think a large bank account means

You are healthy

Or superior

Or worth somethng

Perhaps it demonstrates how predatory the person can be

But people don’t know how to think

So the slander they embrace

SMH

But I’m the one who has messed up thinking?

WTF

It’s basic common sense

People don’t become billionaires without exploitation

You want to tell me how wrong I am about everything

But you don’t even understand the basics

Of how the world is spinning

I watched them all

Destroy the world one resource at a time

Knowing well what the consequences would be

“It will be too late by the time they finally realize”

That’s what my handlers told me in 1983

They were talking about the current apocalypse

But it’s just the beginning

As they explained the insurgency

“They will take it all or leave nothing”

That’s their agenda and leadership knows yet STILL

After so many decades

STILL does nothing

Tools in hand ready to be deployed

Resourced in abundance

Ready to help people overcome

Yet all sit while the insurgency rapes the nation

Leadership continues to sit

Doing absolutely nothing

Other than helping the ones

Destroying EVERYTHING!

NOTHING BUT CORRUPTION

ALL 3 BRANCHES OF GOVERNMENT

STILL HAMSTRUNG

That’s was decades ago when my handlers told me the gameplay

Nothing has changed

They are continuing the same things

They didn’t alter a damn thing!